A few days ago, I had the privilege of visiting a wonderful client. As the boss had already hinted, there was one employee who might struggle with our planned topic that day. And just as expected, the employee exploded shortly before the lunch break and stormed out of the room with a loud announcement: “You can fire me for this now.”
What would you do as a leader?
Flashback to the end of 2023.
We’re on one of our wonderful Mein Schiff cruises, and in the workshops, I notice a guest who repeatedly takes the time to join in, yet from his facial expressions, I can tell that he considers at least 90% of what I say to be complete mumbo jumbo. He is highly successful and classically conditioned—very much in his head. The consequences of this have been affecting him physically for years, his personal life is strained, and deep down, he is not truly happy.
And yet, there is a small, quiet voice inside him that says: “What if there is actually something to this so-called mumbo jumbo?” Because let’s be honest: The other methods—working even harder and shutting down emotionally—haven’t provided the solution he was looking for. So, he chooses a different path.
After the cruise, we see him every Monday at our Caribbean Rebels sessions. He also joins our first retreat on Rügen. And week by week, his state improves. His heart beats in rhythm again, bringing him peace, the stress at home is replaced by joy, and the long-desired goals are now within reach. It’s going well for him.
Back to our conference room.
As the lunch break begins, we sit across from each other at the table.
“What are you going to do now?” I ask him.
“I’m going to send him a WhatsApp message and praise him. His inner demon wants me to fire him so he can be the victim again. But I won’t give him that satisfaction because he is exactly where I was 15 years ago. I’m going to create a safety net for him. Only if he consciously decides to jump outside of it, that will be his choice.”
We finish our soup, and he excuses himself briefly. When he returns from sending the WhatsApp message, he stands before the entire group in the restaurant.
“I just messaged him. I told him that I’m proud of him for finally making a bold decision for himself and that I’m looking forward to seeing him tomorrow. You all have his number. If anyone wants to send him a kind message, feel free to do so. Back then, I would have appreciated a few kind words from my colleagues in such a situation.”
That same evening, he calls him, and they meet for a coffee. The employee—who had already called his wife in the afternoon, telling her that he had messed up and that today would be his last day at the company—is now held firmly in his boss’s arms. After a very emotional talk he gives him words of encouragement and hands the employee a bouquet of flowers.
“Take these home to your wife and have a nice evening together. I look forward to seeing you in the office tomorrow.”
That is the leader of the new generation.
As he tells me the story on the phone during my drive home, I think a lot about him over the next five and a half hours. I’m incredibly proud of him—of how he has grown. Of the fears and inner battles he must have fought when I first confronted him with our ideas about living a happy life.
Even though he shook his head every week after our Rebels call, thinking, “These guys are nuts. This will never work,” he is now one of the biggest advocates and champions of this different way of thinking and acting.
When will you shift your perspective on leadership and transform into a leader of the new generation?
The best way to teach others is by leading by example. And to do that, you need the courage to go through your own struggles and come back stronger.
Are you truly interested in the human being behind the employee? Or is he still—like in the past—just a cheap and willing workforce? And when that workforce is no longer able or willing, is he simply replaced by the next “fool”?
Employees are the most valuable asset in a company—an asset that is becoming increasingly rare. Only when you start caring more about the real person, their worries, and their struggles will that person be willing to walk through fire for you.
You have the choice. Continue as before or change something? Choose wisely—your (business) life might depend on it.
