Have you heard the saying that fear is a poor advisor? Why is that the case? It’s because when we are in a state of fear, we are like in a tunnel and don’t perceive the other possibilities around us. What are people actually afraid of? My mentor, Tony Robbins, says, “We are afraid of not achieving what we want or afraid of losing what we have.” His addition to these two fears is quite beautiful: “Both fears are bullshit.”
Because you can’t lose who you’ve become. Everything you possess at this current stage of your life, you can lose. And then what? Just do it again. You know how it’s done. If you’ve made a cake once, and it falls down when you take it out of the oven, you just make another one. You know how to do it.
In such a situation, you might also realize the difference between what you want and what you need. Do you really need three different cars? Maybe you want them, but you definitely don’t need them because you can only drive one at a time. So many of our fears are indeed nonsense. “Oh dear, what if I have to sell one of my three cars?” Well, what then? You still have two. “That would be my absolute hell,” you might think. You know, there are people who have absolutely nothing. Just the other day, I saw some of these people lying on the street at Hanover train station. Do you believe me that your greatest hell, owning only two cars, would be their biggest dream? Put on your blue glasses more often when fears come your way.
Start thinking differently. Why? Because thinking means asking questions and answering them. Again, thinking means asking questions and answering them. This, in turn, means that the quality of your questions determines the quality of your life. After all, it’s through your thinking that you take action, right? Anke and I discussed this topic in detail with our Caribbean Rebels Community last Monday, precisely what these better questions are and how positively they affect us over an extended period.
And you know, fear often prevails in people who have great difficulty trusting others. They believe that only their own hard work can bring the desired success. And success leads to one gold star after another. Why is this important for such individuals? Because they simply don’t like themselves as they are. That’s why they won’t let others help them. Because then the gold stars wouldn’t be genuinely earned. And others might point fingers and say that they didn’t deserve the success because it was given to them. So, they hold back. And then another hidden fear emerges. God forbid, others might end up being even better than oneself. Oh dear. Therefore, do everything yourself and keep working hard. Trade joy and health for the success you’ve earned yourself. Let everyone see how you suffer. You have no idea how this pattern runs through so many of my 1:1 entrepreneur coaching sessions. And all of them have positively changed their lives by changing their thinking. You know, that’s your entitlement too. Maybe you need support along the way. Or time. Or a push. Whatever it is, I’m here for you. Write to me, and together we’ll make it happen.
I always think of the motto of Alcoholics Anonymous, “You can do it alone, but you can’t do it alone.” The decision to accept help is yours to make. And when you’re ready for it, you can’t do it alone. Because if you could do it alone, you would already be on your way to more success, better health, and more joy. So,… let’s talk.